On the Refusal of the Return

The Monomyth is one of my central beliefs. You could call it my religion. Having a language with which to navigate the trials of life is an important part of my way. I've been thinking about the last phase of the hero's journey. (By the way, on the off chance that anyone actually reads this and you don't know about The Hero's Journey, you can read more about it here.

The integration of my recent growth has been a focus of mine for the last 9 months, and so I've been giving more attention to the hero's return.

"Having found bliss and enlightenment in the other world, the hero may not want to return to the ordinary world to bestow the boon onto his fellow man."

My past misanthropic tendencies, and diminished but still ongoing avoidance has made me feel a bit like I'm refusing the return. But upon further introspection, it's not so much the refusal of the return as it is an observation that no one cares (which in an of itself is an indication of my refusal of the return). The point being that I haven't approached my return reluctantly, but instead have found it difficult to share my experience.

“The return and reintegration with society, which is indispensable to the continuous circulation of spiritual energy into the world, and which, from the standpoint of the community, is the justification of the long retreat, the hero himself may find the most difficult requirement of all. "

I think I'd find this to be even more true if I hadn't isolated myself from society. As a result, I have had less opportunity to share what I've learned. But, with the few opportunities I've had, I have most certainly failed to enlighten others.

"...there is danger that the bliss of this experience may annihilate all recollection of, interest in, or hope for, the sorrows of the world; "

Well, I had that before, and despite my renewed willingness to participate in society, I have found that I am still less hopeful than I know is healthy or constructive. More hopeful than I was, but less hopeful than is good for me.

"...or else the problem of making known the way of illumination to people wrapped in economic problems may seem too great to solve. ..."

I am finding that this most certainly is the case with my integration. With my auto-pilot off, I have noticed not just my own patterns, but those of others. I knew we were a materialistic, racist, selfish country before, but I've been noticing just how much. I feel inadequate or incapable of communicating what I've learned in a way that others can receive.

"Or if the hero, in the third place, makes his safe and willing return, he may meet with such a blank misunderstanding and disregard from those whom he has come to help that his career will collapse. "

This has been the idea that I have been pondering for the past 3 months. Perhaps this has already happened, or perhaps I still need to process what I've learned and work to refine my communication, so that when I share my treasure, it has a better chance of being accepted and understood.

The "disregard" aspect of that previous quote is an egotistical challenge for me. I have learned so much and want to share, and despite my failure to communicate in a way that can be received, I am finding some people to be dismissive of my attempts to share my treasure -- like they know better. To watch my light fall on blind eyes has been a challenge, and has caused me to put a lid on it and focus inward. It takes effort to not be frustrated by this and to not take it personally, but the failure to share my treasure is my failure. So it's up to me to better determine who might be receptive, and to better integrate my lessons so that I can more clearly communicate them in a way that can be heard and understood.